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About "Love of a Man... Love of a Woman... Did God Forget
Why This Book?
Many people have been helped after reading their story in this book. It wasn't
easy starting out writing this text. I would find my way to my keyboard and then found
myself weeping wondering why all of these things happened to me. None of it made sense
to me at all. This is not a question of self pity. No not at all, I am beyond that and I can
actually state it with confidence and conviction.
Through the quest of my thoughts of sorrow and as I continued to protrude through the
struggles of writing, the mental anguish and pain just begun to dissipate until it found its
way out of my thoughts. The Lord instilled the thoughts of joy and my old sense of humor
back into my mind and spirit. The Holy Spirit wrapped His secure arms around me and
transcended its way to my typing finger tips and took over.
I know there is an abundance of books, songs, movies, stories about or refers to various
abuse situations, but this is my true story of continual sexual, mental, physical abuse and
constant persecution starting at the age of 10.
When someone tries to take, rip or peel leaving ragged edges at an innocent soul in such
a cruel and viscous way, how do you get yourself back without losing faith? That is what
the opinions and observations in this book are all about and more!
Through the will of our Lord God and the gift we received from the sacrificed bond the
Lord Jesus Christ paid, along with the Holy Spirit doing His thing - I pray that this short
story touches and manifest in the reader a spiritual enlightenment, positive
encouragement and a will to move forward utilizing the principles that God has provided
for us, to eradicate hate, triumphant over your adversary (ABUSER/s) and to move on in
life to build strong committable healthy lives and relationships.
While riding down that road of contemplating to actually write this book and carrying it to
the point of completion…I thought to myself that I was healed from the mental wounds of
abuse and this short story would be a breeze to write.
This was due to the fact that the acts of abuse happened so long ago and as a matter of
fact 30 years or so ago. So as I jot down the various abusive acts, I realized that some of
the wounds did not heal so I had to regroup and re-heal.
Another observation that dawned on me is that I realized that my abuse somehow
manifested itself on and off throughout my life. I made some bad decisions along the way
and that I realized that sin has no respect of who you are.
Taking a leap of living my life my way or Gods way... I choose God. Utilizing the principles
from God's Word and having Faith played a major roll in all of this. I turned my life around.
I was able to forgive my abusers and that is when I started to live my life to the fullest.
Life became the blessed experience that it was intended to be for me. I also had some
help from some great folks throughout my life that taught me how to have a relationship
with God and to dissipate hate out of my heart.
During my torment by my abusers the question peeped in and out of my mind, "Did God
Really Forget about Me?" Well, you have to know God in order to make that type of
judgment call. The Spirit of God was there all along during my anguish I just did not know
it. I would often ask the question "Where was God?" Well, He is still in the same place He
was, when His own Son was killed. "The rain falls on the just and the unjust, but all things
work together for good for those who Love the Lord."
As a young girl I knew there was a God, but I did not have a personal relationship with
Him. Nor did I know how to have a relationship with Him, so at times I just felt He did not
care about me. Don't get me wrong I did not hate God. It appeared to me that there was a
never ending end to my abuse. I just thought that God was really busy blessing other folks
and He might get to me sooner or later. For years I thought my family was infected with
some serious demonic omen situation that was just plain deviant, defiant, dysfunctional
As I wrote this book I found that obscured thoughts, memories came back in my mind. I
know the Lord had something to do with that too. Now some of these thoughts I did not
want to remember ever again. But, that is OK! I am sharing them with you, because the
Lord wants me too. You see, He made me able and gave me the strength to share. Why?
Well, the Lord manifested his good grace into me, so that I may have unconditional faith in
Him. Expel the thoughts of worry seeds planted in my mind and heart of what one would
think of me and my experiences, and just focus on those that may be in need of this text.
Whatever I make happen for others (unconditionally) I make happen for myself. This
simply means when you bless others by giving unconditionally you receive blessings.
The true story back drop or contents (1st Segment) and reference guide (2nd Segment)
was written for those who have experienced;
" Various types and or levels of abuse.
" It is a great tool for those seeking help to help others who have been abused.
" This reference guide can assist in healing any stormed filled relationship.
" Or merely be utilized as a relationship reference guide for perfectly healthy
" Great guide to encourage those to join a faith based church and share fundamental
This text also provides the following:
1. An abundance of realistic (approachable) healing perspectives, spiritual illustrations,
scriptures for healing, and observations that helped me in my time of need. The process I
have taken to learn to love me with no conditions attached, rebuke pity and self inflicting
abuse out of my life. UI labored hard to eradicate excuses because of my abuseU, have
fun with myself, laugh at myself and to love and give to others unconditionally with a
2. Provides observations regarding the responsibility of our churches, the leaders of
these churches, church leadership accountability for continued counsel and programs for
relationship preparation, relationship commitment, statistics that address issue regarding
the crisis of how we treat each other and its brutal effects, the immoral crisis of
promiscuity behaviors which is the leading factor for a border line epidemic of AID's
among black women, issues related to lack of commitment regarding marriage, children
born out of wedlock, survival skills such as but not limited to; self preservation, develop
creative concepts to generate revenue for each other and with each other, cooking,
cleaning maintaining a family and the importance of marriage.
3. This guide is for those seeking guidance to rebuild self first and build sound trusting
relationships among men and/or women. Understanding that Satan wants respect,
integrity and plan old common courteous to die within your relationships i.e. leaders of the
church, marriage, children, parents, family or friends so that he can allow sin to seep in.
4. This book provides scriptures in relation to getting spiritually conditioned, building and
strengthening relationships, statistics and stereo types regarding the way some view black
men and women. This book tunnels in on the reality of our relationships and the seeds
that we sow regarding excuses for unaccountability of our actions and the major crisis that
we are faced with today because of it.
5. This guide is a great tool for building bonding relationships between you, your church
leaders and church family. It open's the door for stimulating dialog between you and your
church leader and it supplies a spiritual connection.
Throughout the second segment of this book we suggest and highly recommend anyone
seeking further understanding regarding any scriptures, perspective, observations or
principles provided for you in this guide to seek consultation with a faith based church
leader. We also provide a great book study instructional guide and CD for couples,
parents and their youth, men's groups, women's groups, youth or youth groups, church
and organizations. Visit www. thoughtsbyladonna.com or for additional information
Some of us may have had challenges in our lives. It is truly stated throughout our Bibles
that we will encounter storms. How we handle those storms is the question. Do we
respond in despair, in denial, in desperation, or in deliberation through faith?
In the confines of today's society and within the our community we are paying a serious
price for the excuses some of us indulge in and lack of accountability of those excuses for
abuse sake Uno matter what that abuse may beU. Meaning that some are using abuse as
an excuse to justify selfish means, to do what ever they want to do and not be
accountable for their actions. Let's just be real about this - God Gives Us Choices NOT
I do not profess to be THE GREATEST OF WRITERS I am definitely not an English major
nor a scholar in terms of the study of Theology. These writings simply come from my
thoughts and my personal experiences that I want to share with you with hopes that you
will share with others.
My writings are simplistic in its articulation, emphasizing in clarity that all may understand.
My intent is not to preach to you in this guide, but merely to share with you my personal
observations, experiences and mostly to encourage and lead you to Salvation in Christ, to
a faith based church for Christian counsel and nurturing of your Christian growth.
Dr. Bridgett Hillard, First Lady of New Light Christian Center Church located in Houston,
TX whom I admirer and respect… Who also has a great inspiring testimony of storms and
triumphs of her own states:
"An excuse is just a crutch for the uncommitted"
Dr. Bridgett Hillard
"Jesus never made excuse regardless of the persecutions he received by man…"
Why should we!
"I appeal to anyone to utilize and refer this brief guide to those who may be in need of
help to strengthen their faith to forgive, eradicate hate and to build strong committable
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